Femme Fatal
by egochan
Summary: Jounouchi is working late and it leads to some rather unforeseen circumstances. A nice heterosexual pairing for The Evil Laugh.


**Disclaimer:** Er, I don't own Yugioh. This may or may not be a good thing. It depends how would you all take my "improvements" to the plot? (aka; Ryuuji/Honda, Ryou/Seto, Jounouchi/Mai, YnY/YnB, and Isis/Serenity *brother's favorite, had to put it down—smirkie*)

**Note:** When I bragged about my inability write a non-shounen-ai fic (one-shot) with a main _female_ character, TEL thought I was joking. I wasn't, and I chose my wonderful Jounouchi-kun for the male counterpart to prove my point. The lucky lady was my favorite (in Yugioh) Mai. Ergo, positioning Jounouchi working late at a fast food restaurant, I start the beginning of the end of my fan base. 

This fic is dedicated to The Evil Laugh, so go throw your rotten veggies at her. *grin* Oh, and it isn't beta read, so gomen for that.

~#~#~#~

~Femme Fatal~

    Kankakee. Jounouchi played with the word in his mind while wiping his fifth table. Kankakee was a word he'd seen on a map, a city in Illinois. Illinois was in America, the country Anzu was hoping to emigrate to after high school. It was place were people spoke English and movies stars lived. Jounouchi sighed. The extent of his English was "hi" and "thank you." After years of the compulsory subject he had picked up very little. This meant if he were ever to hold a conversation, he could greet and thank and never be able to leave because he didn't know anything else. Personally, he thought his failure was pathetic but could not be helped. When would he need to speak another language?

    "Jounouchi-kun, when you're done with the tables, sweep up and set out the table menus. All right?"

    "Hai."

    The restaurant manager closed the door, unwittingly leaving the place in Jounouchi's hands. Jounouchi didn't notice, however, still running a wet rag over the table and humming.  He scolded himself when he realized he was getting the floor wet. That meant he'd mopping everything up later because he'd been an idiot.

    Jounouchi went to the kitchen for a dry towel. He heard the sound of a bell as someone opened the door in the other room. The blonde rushed out with his towel to see who had just entered and tell them nicely enough that the restaurant was closed.

    A woman stood at the front counter. Jounouchi found himself making an understandable appraisal. If her face were a nice as her figure, he'd forget his lines and make her anything on the menu.

    "We're closed." He found himself saying robotically. His mind was admonishing the words as they made themselves audible. The woman turned around and Jounouchi nearly collapsed. He was facing the blonde, beautiful Mai.

    "I know that," she answered pointing the door. The side of the sign reading open was facing them, which meant she had ignored it entirely.

    "We don't serve after hours."

    Another rehearsed reply. Jounouchi wanted to slap himself. Mai was a beautiful woman, the kind you dreamed about being stranded with on a tropical isle, and all it seemed Jounouchi could do was try to chase her away in being as unappealing as possible.

    _You idiot._

    "Well, don't let me get in your way," Mai sneered. She did nearly the opposite as she walked to the back of the restaurant and took a seat at the last table. Jounouchi watched her rudely, wondering if he'd fallen asleep. Him and a sexy blonde in the same room, alone and after hours? He didn't want to imagine the possibilities, but they came anyway. His mind became a war zone of not-so-innocent imagination gone wild.

    _Kankakee, baka, Kankakee._

    Jounouchi grabbed the washrag and tried to continue his former thoughts on America and odd place names. For some strange reason though, the word Kankakee was starting to sound perversely explicit. What the hell had his mind done to the poor Illinois town? Jounouchi silently swore never to visit the place in the future.

    Meanwhile, Mai, in her corner Jounouchi had decided to dub Hell, was filing her nails and humming. Jounouchi recognized the popular song, overplayed but not entirely forsaken of its credibility. Unfortunately, it was quite the erotic little melody, and Mai had just reached the chorus. Jounouchi was trying hard to keep his attention to cleaning instead. He looked over each surface carefully, doting over every speck into miniscule details. It was a basic stall for time; he knew that as he waited for Mai to do something like leave or announce her intentions before he reached the last table before he came closer to the woman's new "domain." Jounouchi grew nervous as a million ideas of what he could accomplish under three wishes suddenly attacked.

    And why the hell had she chosen _that_ song?

    It was then that Jounouchi noticed a pair of headphone through Mai's hair. She was listening to the song on repeat, but why? It wasn't a terrible thing, but Jounouchi wouldn't be that devoted.

    Mai stood up as Jounouchi finally reached her table. He unwillingly caught the faint sent of perfume as she passed him again. Jounouchi watched her go, for the moment completely lost on where he was and what he was supposed to be doing. His eyes betrayed his manners and traveled down Mai's long hair. But, before his imagination could go any further in creeping him out, however, Mai did the unbelievable.

    She tripped.

    _Baka, you were supposed to clean that water up._

    Jounouchi watched in horror, all hope fading away with a desperate shriek. Why him? Why was he even born?

    "Shimatta," Mai growled from the floor, "Are you gonna help me up or gape like an idiot."

    Jounouchi bolted to reality at these words and shot over to help Mai. She scowled, her mouth becoming a thin line. Jounouchi blushed guiltily and handed her his dry towel.

    "Gomen nasai."

    Mai slowly calmed down and suddenly smiled. Jounouchi was beyond confused as she started laughing. Mai seemed perfectly amused at something. She lost Jounouchi at that point, though.

    "You sure you didn't hit your head there?" Jounouchi asked, not charming like Otogi Ryuuji in a woman's moment of tarnished pride. Mai looked at Jounouchi as if he were the one who didn't get it. He returned the glaze, equally confused.

    "I'm wearing a new pair of heels." Mai said as though it was supposed to explain everything. Jounouchi, not the brightest bulb, didn't get it.

    "And?"

    One of Mai's expertly manicured eyebrows heightened at this but she didn't say anything. Jounouchi didn't know what she was thinking and grew even further baffled. He finally grabbed his washrag and started wiping the Mai-free table.

    "Oh for the love of God!" Mai exclaimed after a few minutes of silence and table washing, "You're alone with a total babe and all you can do is clean a damn table. Either you're extremely pathetic or you're gay."

    Jounouchi stopped what he was doing and glared at the insult.

    "I'm not either!" he stated indignantly.

    "Then you find me attractive?" Mai asked eagerly. Jounouchi doubted she really needed to be told so, but humored to inquire.

    "Yeah," he said with a slight smirk as his imagination reminded exactly what he liked about her.

    "Then buy me dinner."

    "Nani?" Jounouchi asked, shocked and confused. He wasn't sure if she was insulting him in some way or actually suggesting he do such a thing.

    "A couple of places are still open. I'll let you drive."

    "Hai," Jounouchi agreed, seeing no better alternative (or, none he really wanted to enact). Dinner with a attractive young woman wasn't something he was too willing to turn down.  He quickly changed out of his uniform and grabbed his keys. Mai was waiting at the door and they both exited as Jounouchi happily forgot about his duties.

    It was a beautiful night.

    Unfortunately, the next morning wasn't so handsome to the blonde boy.

    "I came in this morning and not only was the door unlocked, the floor was sopping wet! What the hell were you thinking? I almost tripped and broke my neck!"

    "Uh, gomen?" Jounouchi slurred, find it difficult to stay awake.

    "You're fired!"

    "WHAT?"

~#~#~#~

**Endnote:** Uh, there it is? *blink* …And there it is….

See, I'm not just a shounen-ai fan. Heterosexual pairings are nice too. *looks around nervously*

…And remember to throw your rotten veggies at The Evil Laugh. Thank you! *ducks behind her insane fic reader*

~Ling no Yong~


End file.
